Oil Change

Oil changes use to intimidate, because I know nothing about cars. Well, actually, I am still intimidated but I at least know what to expect know. You pull in and they ask you a few simple questions that don't really seem to matter. You leave the keys in the car because they are going to pull it out of the garage in the end. Actually the part where you pull into the garage is sort of scary, cars get fucked up when they fall into that hole. Lucky the man (or I suppose women, but it never is a women now is it?) give you the universal airport signals so you line up your car correctly. I am not sure what correctly is but somehow I don't fall in the hole. The airport signals must be an effective and universal form of communication. For thousand of years those gestures must have existed though they are probably less useful on a camel. Anyways, you get out of car and go wait in the waiting room. I think in the future they are going to figure out how to create a proper waiting room. Something is still too expensive or wasn't been invented yet because there is no reason why waiting rooms need to be boring. Daytime TV doesn't cut it even with a flat screen. I might be wrong about magazines but in general I don't trust them. I suppose one solution is go to a oil change that is connected to a Walmart. Say what you will about Walmart it is much better than a waiting room. Besides you could probably be shopping for something. Unless you are poor like me, then it is just something you walk around in. One benefit of walking around Walmart is that they can't find you to tell you about the status of your air filters. The first time I went in to get my oil changed I don't even think I knew there were air filters in the car. They genuinely worried me when I was told they might need to be replaced. It made me not want to drive. Driving is expensive! You have to replace air filters! There is something uncomfortable about the way they try to sell it to you. It sort of makes you think that they just have dirty ones they show everyone. I don't really think they do. I think it is just there poor to mediocre sales man which makes me think they are lying. There is still always something wrong and that just makes me suspicious. It is paranoia but still they come at you with air filters and a piece of paper with fluids on it, and I am supposed to respect their opinion on my car. Again I know nothing about cars too and I am not very good at human interaction sometimes. I don't really want to get my oil changed but I do want to drive and I don't know how to change it myself. Cars are needy. Maybe I should make it a goal to live with out a car, which I guess means city or middle of nowhere where they don't even have roads. I do not hesitate to choose the former. Of course, bad guys live in cities (and bears and lions in places that don't have roads) and how are you supposed to out run them if you don't have a car. I guess a gym membership, but now you are starting to get back into spending money and doing things I have no interest in, so maybe a car is just easier. Whatever. The men always look so disappointed when I tell them no I do not want to replace that cabin air filter that has small trees of dust growing in it, I like breathing in dust and having less efficient heating and cooling. It doesn't mean you are a bad sales person I am just an asshole with trust issues who also happens to be poor and is very defensive about the fact I know little about cars. I have actually changed the air filters before when my dad showed me. That doesn't mean I know how to do it but it looked easy enough at the time. Anyways, he goes back and hopefully isn't to spite full and puts everything back the way it is suppose to go. You get called up to the counter and pay a seemingly random amount of money. You go out to your car and you drive off. You are free until the sticker on your window say that you have driven 4,000 mile and it is time to go back in a get told the things you had forgotten about are still work with you car. Such is life. Still might be easier then going to the gym.